As we look ahead to 2025, I keep asking myself: why are so many sales teams still applying 20- or 30-year-old discovery processes?
These methods were built for a world where buyers needed you to help diagnose their problems.
But today’s buyers are different. They’ve already:
- Done a lot of work by the time they engage with you
- Identified their problem, scoped out solutions, and even shortlisted vendors
- Committed to a course of action
Buyers don’t want to retrace their steps and go back to the discovery phase. They’ve invested time, energy, and resources into understanding their problem and potential solutions, and they are naturally resistant to starting over.
This is what’s called “Escalation of Commitment.” Buyers have escalated their emotional, intellectual, and sometimes financial investment, and that’s exactly what sellers right now need to address.
The Problem with Traditional Discovery
For years, sellers were trained to walk prospects through a discovery process that often assumed they were coming to you with little understanding of their own needs. But that’s not true anymore.
Buyers today are well-informed and self-sufficient. Starting with basic discovery questions for someone who is already 70 percent through their buying journey frustrates them, and rightly so.
Dr. Leff Bonney from Florida State University Sales Institute commented on my recent LinkedIn post on this topic, sharing a story about Neil Rackham, the creator of SPIN Selling. Leff mentioned to Neil that he must be proud of SPIN’s long-standing influence.
Neil’s response was surprising: he thought we should have moved beyond these techniques by now. And he’s right—why are we still relying on processes designed for an era when buying decisions were made face-to-face and when information wasn’t as readily available?
Enter “De-Escalation of Commitment”
This is why I believe one of the most crucial skills for sellers in 2025 is the ability to “de-escalate commitment.”
Rather than forcing buyers to revisit their earlier decisions through a traditional discovery process, you need to help them evaluate their current path and guide them forward without making them feel like they’ve wasted their time.
This approach, which Leff Bonney and I have been researching, is about recognizing the buyer’s current state and finding a way to gently shift their thinking. It’s about having a “yes/and” conversation instead of a “yeah/but” one.
Rather than challenging the buyer’s conclusions outright, you need to acknowledge their hard work and introduce new perspectives in a way that complements their understanding.
Our research has shown that this approach, when executed properly, creates twice the opportunity to be included in the decision process and can have twice the impact on the final outcome. Buyers are more willing to engage when they don’t feel like they’re being asked to take a step back, but rather, are being shown how to move forward.
Why De-Escalation Works
The reason de-escalation is so effective lies in the psychology of decision-making. When buyers have already invested significant resources into scoping out a solution, they don’t want to feel like they’ve made the wrong choice.
But if you can guide them to see a better path forward—without making them feel like their previous efforts were wasted—they’re much more likely to be receptive. This is where the “gain frame” comes into play.
When talking to early-stage buyers, loss aversion tactics (highlighting the risks of staying in the status quo) can be powerful.
But with late-stage buyers, those tactics can backfire. Instead, you need to focus on the positive outcomes they can achieve by adjusting their course. It’s about showing them what they can gain, rather than what they might lose.
The Future of Sales
The ability to de-escalate commitment isn’t just a tactical skill; it’s a strategic imperative.
As organizations continue to navigate a world where buyers are more empowered than ever, sellers need to evolve. The old discovery and qualification processes are no longer enough to help you stand out or add value.
If you want to have a meaningful impact on the buying process, you need to meet buyers where they are—and help them move forward.
So, as we look ahead, the question becomes: are you ready to embrace this new skill?
Because those who master the skill of de-escalation will be the ones who win in this modern, more complex sales landscape.
